Married Life: Living with a girl, meals for two, and other interesting concepts.

The week before I got married I was sleeping alone in my new apartment. It was kind of scary being in that place all by myself, maybe because I had never lived on my own without any roommates before. Little did I know how quickly this feeling would pass as the walls and rooms of my life would forever be inhabited by the bizarre and mysterious Woman.

One day, as I was preparing the closet to accommodate a second occupant, it dawned on me for the first time that getting married meant, among many other things, having a girl for a roommate. WEIRD! My mind filled the shelves and hooks with all sorts of girly things. Blouses, shoes, scrunchies, jewelry, unmentionables...
Still winded with this new concept, I staggered my way into the bathroom where on the counter a blow dryer and curling iron appeared in my mind's eye, surrounded with- not electric shavers or Axe body spray, but bobby pins, lotions, MORE scrunchies, and pastel colored little containers whose purpose was a complete mystery to me.
I could see my panicked expression reflecting back at me in the mirror as if begging me for an explanation.
"Why is this happening?" the reflection pleaded.
"Calm down, calm down" I assured, "we're going to marry Lindsey in a few days."
"But, all the girly stuff! She's a girl! We're going to live with a GIRL?!"
"Yes, that's right. Lindsey is a girl. A very nice girl. We like her, remember? She's nice." I reasoned. The face in the mirror seemed to soften a little.
"Right... right. She IS nice... Okay."
With one last uneasy glance at the foreign objects on the counter, the reflection took a deep breath of resolve. The face hardened. The reflection was my own again. The counter top once more bare porcelain.

I spent a moment or two standing in the bathroom absorbed with my thoughts. After a short lull, I could feel the lonely scary feeling begin to fall upon me again like chilled snowflakes. With a shiver I shook it off before it could really settle. I felt like if I kept moving I could keep it from weighing down too much on my shoulders.

Upon getting to the kitchen, I opened the refrigerator mechanically. The fridge looked a lot smaller on the outside, but the mostly empty jug of milk gave the otherwise barren interior a cavernous feel. I wondered if having a wife would result in different refrigerator contents that those which came with living with other men.
I wasn't hungry, but I threw together a peanut butter a jam sandwich anyways.


I lost all my steam. Plus I've been writing this at work between copying and pulling charts. So, I should end here for now. By the way, most of the above is fictionalized, except maybe for how I felt. Meh, whatever.